THE WOMEN

     I recently saw a post on Facebook by a young woman in which stated that FB friends shouldn’t take the place of real life relationships and she prayed that one would discern the difference this year. I wasn’t sure whom she was talking to, but my initial reaction was to overlook this statement because I felt it had nothing to do with me. This statement would replay over and over later in my mind. I would not be able to let this statement go for sometime into the evening so my next response was should I discern for myself had I established FB friends instead of real life  relationships. The answer? A resounding “yes.”

      I spent some time praying and seeking God about this particular area of my life. I asked God why didn’t I establish the two new friendships as He had directed last year? Why did I only have friends at work, which are really co-workers not friends otherwise I would spend time with them outside of work. Why didn’t I have any female friends outside of my best friend of over twenty-five years and my sister-in-law? What about the friends from previous states where I had lived? Just an email here and there doesn’t make it a friendship, besides we never see or even call one another.

      So here I am writing to you, the thing I love to do the most because I want to help - you’ve guessed it, women! I’ve received a revelation that in my desire to help women, I have neglected to establish friendships with women. I do spend time witnessing to others’ which I totally adore doing so. I want to honestly open my heart to women so they may see the glory of restoration available to them from the Most High God through Jesus Christ. So again, why don’t I have any friends? Let me add this drop of reality: I do not have any male friends either, but this is because I completely choose to do so. I don’t date, nor have friends that are “boys”. You should have caught that! For me, until God sends my man of valor into my life, I choose to have the companionship of men in the company of many- church. It’s a safety net for me as I live in obedience to the Word of God. Maybe chit-chat here and there at gatherings, etc, but nothing pass that- again by choice. When I am completely available to “court” and marry, I look forward to it!

      As I spent more time in meditation, two words came to me: The Women. As I received more revelation on these two words, I realized I’ve open my heart to complete strangers across the world, but not to those near me. Why? The women of my past hurt me severely and as I scanned my past, I realized I had forgiven these women, but put up a blockade towards developing new friendships with women.

      I became I little unsettled as I realized this is one of the major reasons I don’t regularly participate in our Women of Virtue ministry. It is directed by a true Proverbs 31 woman, yet I can’t get pass a ministry with just women? Sad, because it’s so much available to me within this ministry. Yet a picture of cackling hens seems to overwhelm me- yes, of course it’s a trick of the Enemy!

      So here I am. What do I do? First, allow God to truly heal me from the hurt and pain from The Women: the ones who died…the ones who slept with….the woman who stole….the woman who lied… the woman who denied….the fake one, the gossiper, the backstabber; the woman who spewed venom from her lips….the woman who accused…the woman who abused…the woman who assumed; the drug addict, the deceiver, the unbeliever. Second, allow the Holy Spirit to guide and show me the friendships that God wants me to establish and trust God to develop that relationship. Third, realize no one is perfect and I may get hurt again, but this time, God will be with me to mend or even defend.

      I am ready now Lord, I’m sorry that I have blocked those whom You have sent to partner, prepare, propel or even just love me. I repent in the name of Jesus as I recommit to establish new friendships this year.   I commit to participate in the women’s ministry because I know that I cannot go this road completely alone and I don’t want to- besides, You created a team, an army and even Jesus had help. I praise You that you created me as a woman to become a W.O.V. a woman who wins, a woman of empowerment! I am committed to being a good, Christian friend to others. I will seek out new friendships with great expectancy. I am ready to be able to share my heart with the women you send in my path and continue to minister to those whom You’ve assigned. I can still trust those who are trustworthy because I first put my trust in You and you will guide and protect me. I am thankful for your post- you know who you are- thankful that yes, I have discerned the difference.

Coffee anyone?

Praise be to God!

With the love of Christ,

Dee-Dee McDuffie
019/dlm
*I always apply scipture with anything that I write, but I didn't feel it was necessary, please know- you must first show yourself friendly if you want friends.  It's in the Bible- believe.